Monday Meltdown

Have you ever had one of those days that you just got overwhelmed & caught off guard? Well, today was that day for me. The weather was sooooo beautiful & I had got all of my morning chores accomplished & a bath & hair clean -just to have an appointment with the doctor. I have a lovely young lady doctor that I am nuts about. She is kind & sensitive to your feelings- But- I think my "unraveling" came once we arrived at the clinic & signed in. I had been off of my meds for two weeks. I had called & told them that I would run out of my meds Before my doctor visit & I did not know what to do. The young pharmacist had called & said that she would have someone call me . But nobody called & I ran out  &  Mr. Fibromyalgia jumped on me with a vengeance. The pain moved back in & my body was consumed with fire & the brain fog settled back in & I was lost. It was horrible -but I think I bluffed my way through as I did not want my DH to have anything else on him as he fights with his cancer.

Once we arrived at the clinic I could feel that depression settle on me -just the thought that I have finally been diagnosed with this monster & the right medicine which locks it away in its cage , but had been denied it for two weeks just seemed more than I could bear on the inside. It is hard to fight extreme pain because it leads to exhaustion . But, when I gave the girl my papers she handed me my prescription- and was dated two weeks ago-it had been here all that time & I had not been notified. I told her I had a doctor appointment & did not know about my meds. She asked if I wanted them & I said a definite YES . But while I sat there waiting something inside of me began to crumble & when that sweet little nurse called me as I approached her & she asked those fateful words -how are you? That did it - I dissolved in tears -of course -mortifying myself.Once the tears started -there was no stopping them.

I made an absolute idiot of myself - but they definitely found out that I needed those meds . Same story with my sweet doctor. We had a sweet chat -in between tears. It turned out that my thyroid was messed up too. I showed her my gums -how I seemed to have a bony area sticking out on one side which made me 'whoppy-jawed". She too thought that when he had pulled my teeth he had broken that one side off uneven leaving me really whoppy-jawed. I asked if she thought it might interfer with getting dentures to fit & she said probably not since they would make a mold. But, I just hate that EVERYTHING on me is always Quirky.

So it ended up she raised  my thyroid meds & I have to have bloodwork in April . I apologized to her and told her that I guess once I was behind doors where DH could not see me I just let all of my pain & fears loose . I try to be so brave for him as I do not want to add any extra burden on him at this time when he needs all of his strength to fight this disease. I will be fine once I get my meds ( or as Chris on DietCokeRocks  - calls them- happy pills) back in my system . Plus, I get to see my counselor on Weds & they are calling for such beautiful weather here -with all of that sunshine - I will be on top of the world  & a new woman.  LOL

So, with high hopes I came home -did evening chores  & fed us -then started on that serger once again. I pulled the manual out & read & re-read taking it one sentence at a time -like Lynne had taught me to use for patterns & construction.

After another hour we had come to some kind of a compromise-not perfect -but usable for a shirt for me -hopefully to work out the kinks as we go along. So, I managed to get the shoulders re-sewn & the neckband attached. Making progress -but I need to lock the chickens up & feed the woodstove & get ready for bed as DH has a doctor appointment in the morning.

I hope you guys have had a lovely day - the weather here is going to be "unbelieveably too beautiful " here for the rest of the week. Everybody both here & in other countries are talking about the "global warming affect" & wondering if this is why all of our weather is so different?

So, love to all & Happy stitches to you until I see you again. :-)