Sunday, January 29, 2012

Thank goodness for my little guardians


It was cold here today & with the wind blowing -the cold hurt too much to take my walk, so I finished my chores & went in to feed DH &myself . But his stomach was hurting -we sat & watched a tv program & for the 3rd time in my life - I heard my husband cry. The first time was when his sister was shot by her husband who then shot himself too. DH could not find closure because the person he wanted to kill himself was now gone-so he bundled that anger up & carried it with him for years.

The second time I saw my husband cry was when his Mama died. She was always his best friend & when he lost her -he lost a piece of his heart. I knew what that felt like because when my Mama died , I knew what it felt like to be an Orphan-it was horrible.

So , now with this monster called cancer -it is such a terrible event to deal with. When someone you love is facing a battle like that - neither of you have any kind of "manual" to follow - you just take it one step at a time, and sometimes those steps are slippery..

I decided I would work on that pair of shorts for his sister for her birthday this week & I really tried hard, BUT- when it came time to sew the crotch seam & it would not match up - I discovered that I had sewn two front pieces together & two back pieces together. One of my mistakes that usually tries to haunt me. I knew it was because my mind was not paying attention to what I was doing. My "want to" and my "can do" -just were not on the same page.

I am not sharing this with you for sympathy - I think it is because I know that we ALL will have to face this sooner or later and I do not have an answer to how to behave.I think that the one thing to hang onto is that love is the answer . She binds us all together in this experience we take.

I love you guys.;-)

4 comments:

  1. I have been there. Cancer is so scary. And if you are blessed enough to beat it once you always wonder when it will come back. I am there now. May the Lord hold you in his arms during this journey.

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  2. My heart hurts for you and your darling hubby.
    When men cry it is SO SAD and hard to watch.
    Just hug him lots and show you love him, no matter what.

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  3. I am so sorry to hear of your struggle.. That C word is terrible.
    I pray for strength for you and your dear hubby.
    Hugs to you Susan

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  4. Linda, I hear what you are saying and send you both my love and healing thoughts. Stay strong and know that we love you too.

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