Got Lost on a Boat Canopy

I am so sorry that I was gone. My son brought home to his house a project of making a canopy for a boat. He had done some research and found that there were not many people in our next of the woods that did that kind of work. I think there are two and they stay packed with business and usually stay about 3 months behind time.Of course I had never made a boat canopy and neither had his wife. He thought it would be so wonderful IF his wife and I could learn this skill.

It would be so wonderful IF I could -but with this fibromyalgia -when what they call a fibromyalgia  fog hits you - it is like losing yourself in a fog and no matter how hard you try - you just cannot pull up the information that you need. And of course this was one of those times for me. I would look at it and I just could not see his ideas. I knew they were great ideas - But - with this you can look at something all day long and not make heads of tales  out of most anything .You know that "deer in the headlights" feeling - that pretty well describes it and I certainly did not want to blow the project for him . I bluffed for a while -but finally Just had to tell him I could not understand and could not make any sense in my head. I know he had to be puzzled because I used to be full of ideas and I really did not want for him to see that side of me now. It was disappointing and we made SOOO many mistakes . We have worked hard of it for the last week and the last couple of nights -we have worked late into the night and I am SOOO tired. It breaks my heart to disappoint him . IF I had it in me I would be thrilled to just take it and make it and take the burden off of him.But, I don't have it in me . That fibromyalgia Is a big pain in the "rumpus"!It is the main reason that I have so much trouble sewing the pants and ripping them out and sewing them again and ripping them out again. It is a nightmare -but you just have to work with what you have got.I would never disappoint my sons -if I had my way.  I  know that he hopped that his wife and I would take off like rockets and be able to turn it into a business for both of us and I would have loved that too.It's like life took a left when I took a right and I got lost in the blur.

I also got to see our younger son who had back surgery about 3 weeks ago .He and his little pregnant wife came up to the older son's house for a small cook-out. HE is in SO much pain that it breaks my heart. He said his back has improved a little bit -but now the pain in all the joints in his leg Is driving him crazy,but the doctor said it takes time to heal. I could not help but notice how much weight he had lost. Just 9 weeks ago he was a happy -healthy average young man working hard on heavy machinery and looking forward to his first baby in Nov. Now he is a scared young man dealing with overload of pain and not knowing from one day to the next how he will deal with this mess of pain that he finds himself in . It is a horrible thing to see your children hurting and not be able to fix the boo-boo with a kiss like you could when they were small.

Plus, we now have a small pile of trees that have come down in our yard from all the wind and the rain we have had lately. I heard the trees snapping  a couple of nights ago, but I could not find them in the dark -so we waited until daylight and there they were. DH has asked the grandkids if they will help and they said yes.

I am sorry I have no pictures to share, but I would think it would not take long to do this boat project and then it would be Very Late when we got home and I can hardly keep my eyes open. Last night when we came home at 2AM and my eyes were burning and tearing up and I was rubbing them  like crazy. I told DH -do you know what my eyes are doing? He said no and I told him that my eyeballs were crying -but I was not and he laughed. Then I asked him - "DO your know what my eyeballs have said to me" and he said no, what? They told me that They were almost 60 years old and they were not being treated right!  LOL


I hope everyone is happy and healthy and the best wishes for all of you. :)